Thursday, December 23, 2010

Is Christmas green?

It sure as hell is red and green, but it sure as hell isn't green.  But let me begin with an "I don't do Xmas" disclaimer.  But oughtn't that be obvious? (and is that the correct usage of the word oughtn't?) (and isn't oughtn't a wordicle?)  Yeah, we're Jewish and we don't even do that.  So we sure as hell don't do Xmas.  And this time of year (say ... mid-October through the New Year) is irritating as hell, because everyone continuously tries to cram the red and green crap down my throat, over and over again, 24 hours a day, in pretty much the same way that we just cannot escape the ridiculous political garbage come every election season (on TV, on the radio, on sight-nauseating billboards along every road ... vote for this person ... no, vote for that person ...).  But anyway ...

So for whatever reason this morning, as I was sitting down doing my daily "business", the thought of whether or not Xmas is green popped into my head.  And I immediately said to myself, "No."

Why?  Isn't it immediately apparent?  Think of what people do during the holiday season every year:

Point One: They put lights up all over their houses, their yards, their trees, inside their houses, on their trees inside their houses (and don't get me started on the rididulousness of that one ...), and on and on.   Now think of how much electricity is wasted when all of these buzzillions of lights are on all night long on millions of houses and in millions of yards for a couple of months every year.  Not to mention the fools that 'forget' to take their lights down each year.  Need I go on?

Point Two: They kill trees.  Why?  So they can put them back up in their houses for a few weeks to ... so that ... oh hell, I really don't know why.  Yeah, the Xmas enthusiasts will say that oh so many trees were planted just for this purpose, thereby giving life to buzzillions of trees that otherwise would not have been planted.  But I counter very simply with "Here's a thought: Why not plant the trees and then let them live?!?!?!?!"  Is that too complicated?

Point Three: The one thing that we do do during the so-called Xmas season is participate in the gift-giving thing, but that is pretty much for one simple reason only: my Dad-in-law's birthday just happens to be in December 25.  So it has morphed into a very big give-all-the-kids-gifts event.  And my Dad-in-law too because it is, after all, his birthday.  But what is the first thing we do after we buy a gift for someone?  We wrap it up so it's a surprise.  Wrapping paper.  Yes, some of it gets recycled, and we try to recycle as much of it as we possibly can.  But how much of this paper is just chucked?  I certainly don't know, and even if it's all recycled ... what a waste.

So, my conclusion is that Xmas is not green.  But I guess there isn't any way to stop that, now is there?

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